Halle Berry / Britney Spears
October 18, 2003

(COLD OPENING) Kobe & Vanessa prepare for press conference

Highlights:

-- Finesse was good as Kobe and Maya was very funny as Kobe's wife.

 

Lowlights:

-- None.

 

Misc. Comments & Observations:

-- I actually thought Finesse would really say LFNY at first, but I don't think a featured player ever gets to say it this early.

 

Grade: B

 

 

 

(MONOLOGUE) Halle Berry refuses to kiss Britney Spears

Highlights:

-- The backstage scene with Jimmy, Tina, and Lorne. Plus, it's always good seeing Lorne.

 

Lowlights:

-- The ending was pretty weak, and it was dumb how they said they were gonna kiss but didn't end up doing it. I guess it was some cheap ratings gimmick.

 

Grade: B

 

 

 

(COMMERCIAL) "Gaystrogen"

Highlights:

-- This was hilarious, especially the gay-dancing rainbow colored diagram.

 

Lowlights:

-- None.

 

Misc. Comments & Observations:

-- Funny how we didn't get an expected same-gender kiss in the monologue, but we get one here instead and with two guys.

 

Grade: A+

 

 

 

(SKETCH) "The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular"

Highlights:

-- Forte singing the opening theme song.

-- Horatio's Don Zimmer impression was good.

-- Darrell's Bob Costas impression.

 

Lowlights:

-- The writing itself was weak, and Zimmer's falling down was overdone.

 

Grade: C-

 

 

 

(SKETCH) "Versace Halloween"

Highlights:

-- The "candy cigarettes".

-- Horatio as Elton John, with that Spongebob costume.

 

Lowlights:

-- This Versace stuff has gotten old since last season.

 

Misc. Comments & Observations:

-- Halle jumping through the wall reminded me of Rachel in last year's Celebrity Game sketch.

 

Grade: C-

 

 

 

(COMMERCIAL) "Telelink"

Highlights:

-- None.

 

Lowlights:

-- What the hell? Where was the joke here? If this is making fun of a real ad, then I guess I need to see that to find this "parody" funny.

 

Grade: F

 

 

 

(SKETCH/COMMERCIAL) "Quick Ones"

Highlights:

-- Forte's part saved this.

 

Lowlights:

-- The rest, especially the cheesy double ententre at the end.

 

Grade: C-

 

 

 

(NEXT LIVE EPISODE) November 1, 2003: Kelly Ripa

-- Damn! I remember I was going to add her to my list for this year's Guess the Host contest, but took her out at the last minute and replaced her with someone else. I'm really kicking myself now

 

 

 

(SKETCH) Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House

Highlights:

-- A few funny lines.

 

Lowlights:

-- This was basically just a sketch version of Finesse's Update commentary from the season premiere, and it was way funnier there. He seems promising so far, but needs to do more original stuff.

 

Grade: D

 

 

 

(COMMERCIAL) "The Sunday National Enquirer"

Highlights:

-- Pretty good.

-- Nice to see the host in the commercial.

 

Lowlights:

-- None.

 

Misc. Comments & Observations:

-- They're doing a lot of commercials tonight.

 

Grade: B

 

 

 

(MUSICAL PERFORMANCE)

-- No comment.

 

 

 

(WEEKEND UPDATE) Fallon & Fey, Billy Smith, Bart & Bob Swerski

Highlights:

-- Jimmy's Dalzel-Job joke.

-- Fred's Native American character felt like a Fericito rehash and fell flat with the studio audience, but I still liked it. It was an "Andy Kaufman/funny in a weird way" type of thing, and Fred pulls off that kind of stuff well.

-- The Chinese Space Launch bit.

-- Tina's openly gay fraternity joke.

-- At first, I thought it was pathetic how they brought back Superfans with Horatio now doing it, but then George Wendt came on in the 2nd half and it got a lot better. He should've been there from the beginning.

 

Lowlights:

-- Tina's 4-year old/marijuana joke.

-- Not many other jokes stood out as very good.

-- The first half of the Superfans bit, before Wendt came on.

 

Grade: B-

 

 

 

(SKETCH) "The Best of Klymaxx"

Highlights:

-- Rachel's one line was funny, because of the way she said it.

 

Lowlights:

-- I didn't like the rest of this at all.

-- The segments with Seth as Joey Lawrence were weak and was with the weird long pauses when Seth was talking to Fred?

 

Misc. Comments & Observations:

-- Finesse plays a woman twice in the same episode.

 

Grade: F+

 

 

 

(SKETCH) Tom Brokaw records a voicemail message

Highlights:

-- Parnell's Brokaw is always good.

-- Brokaw's angry message at the end.

 

Lowlights:

-- The rest dragged.

 

Grade: D+

 

 

 

(NEXT WEEK) October 25, 2003: The Best of Tracy Morgan

-- Well, this is a surprise! I didn't hear anything about this beforehand, plus I thought they were going to air a Halloween special like they do every year at this time. I'm a big Tracy fan and always thought he never got enough credit, so that's why it surprises me and makes me happy to see them giving him his own Best of special. It'll probably be filled with mostly sketches from his last 3 seasons since that's where he was allowed to really shine after being so underused in his first few years. I bet back around 1998, if you told someone Tracy would be getting a "Best of" in the future, they'd laugh their head off in disbelief.

 

 

 

(MUSICAL PERFORMANCE)

-- No comment.

 

 

 

(SKETCH) Ashford & Simpson

Highlights:

-- None.

 

Lowlights:

-- This was like a black version of the Culps, whom I never liked in the first place. And the Halle/Finesse stuff didn't add anything else.

 

Grade: F

 

 

 

(SKETCH) Gary the Speed-reader flirts with a lady

Highlights:

-- Forte finally getting a starring role in a sketch this season! 'bout damn time.

-- A good closing sketch. All the closing sketches have been surprisingly great so far this season (The last telemarketing call, The Barry Gibb Talk Show, and now this). Hopefully, they can keep up this streak. Too bad the rest of this episode couldn't have been like this.

 

Lowlights:

-- The ending seemed abrupt. Did they run out of time and had to cut this short (ala "Telemarketers" from the Jack Black episode)? I hate when that happens.

 

Grade: A-

 

_________________________________________________

 

Overall Episode Grade: C-

 

Overall Highlights:

-- The backstage part of the monologue.

-- Gaystrogen.

-- Forte in Quick Ones.

-- Fred as Billy Smith.

-- George Wendt's cameo.

-- Gary the Speed-reader flirts with a lady.

 

Overall Lowlights:

-- No follow-up to the Halle/Britney kiss (not that I wanted to see it or anything ;) ). The goodnights did get cut off only after a few seconds, so maybe they did it there.

-- The writing in The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular.

-- The usual weak Versace stuff.

-- Telelink.

-- Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House.

-- The 1st half of the Superfans segment.

-- The Best of Klymaxx.

-- Tom Brokaw records a voicemail message.

-- Ashford & Simpson.

 

Funniest Single Moment:

-- The gay-dancing rainbow colored diagram in Gaystrogen.

 

Best Lines:

-- Britney Spears: "I already did that Madonna kiss at the VMA's. I feel like it's already been done."

Lorne Michaels: "That was cable. I don't think that many people watch MTV."

 

-- Jimmy Fallon: "Former royal navy lieutenant commander Patrick Dalzel-Job, the British war hero who was the inspiration for the character James Bond, died this week at the age of 90. His family was shaken, not stirred."

 

-- Tina Fey: "Four members of Alpha Lambda Tau are seeking to make theirs the first gay fraternity at the University of Texas, San Antonio. They say the fraternity will be just like every other fraternity, except with slightly more gay sex."

 

-- Chris Parnell as Tom Brokaw: "This evening on 'NBC Nightly News', we'll take a look at how the national deficit will impact on the wealthiest 1%. And on 'The Fleecing of America', a new study that links dyslexia and male pattern baldness."

 

-- Will Forte as Gary the Speed-reader: "I'll just be sitting here reading the Bible. (after speed-reading it) Done. Poooor Jesus"

 

 

 

CASTMEMBER COUNT DOWN

DRATCH: 2 sketches (1: Telelink; 2: The Best of Klymaxx)

 

FALLON: 2 sketches (1: Halle Berry refuses to kiss Britney Spears; 2: Weekend Update)

 

FEY: 2 sketches (1: Halle Berry refuses to kiss Britney Spears; 2: Weekend Update)

 

FORTE: 3 sketches (1: The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular; 2: Quick Ones; 3: Gary the Speed-reader flirts with a lady)

 

HAMMOND: 1 sketch (1: The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular)

 

MEYERS: 3 sketches (1: Telelink; 2: Quick Ones; 3: The Best of Klymaxx)

 

PARNELL: 5 sketches (1: Kobe & Vanessa prepare for press conference; 2: Gaystrogen; 3: Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House; 4: The Sunday National Enquirer; 5: Tom Brokaw records a voicemail message)

 

POEHLER: 4 sketches (1: Quick Ones; 2: Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House; 3: The Sunday National Enquirer; 4: The Best of Klymaxx)

 

RICHARDS: 2 sketches (1: The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular; 2: Telelink)

 

RUDOLPH: 6 sketches (1: Kobe & Vanessa prepare for press conference; 2: Versace Halloween; 3: Telelink; 4: Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House; 5: The Best of Klymaxx; 6: Ashford & Simpson)

 

SANZ: 3 sketches (1: The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular; 2: Versace Halloween; 3: Weekend Update)

 

ARMISEN: 4 sketches (1: Gaystrogen; 2: Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House; 3: Weekend Update; 4: The Best of Klymaxx)

 

MITCHELL: 5 sketches (1: Kobe & Vanessa prepare for press conference; 2: Gaystrogen; 3: Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House; 4: The Best of Klymaxx; 5: Ashford & Simpson)

 

THOMPSON: 3 sketches (1: Girlfriends at the Japanese Steak House; 2: The Best of Klymaxx; 3: Ashford & Simpson)

 

Maya, Parnell, and Finesse were the stars of the night.

 

 

DAS ENDE.